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Sunday, August 12, 2012

Turning the spotlight of compassion toward oneself

In our roles with each other and in the world we often find it easier to extend kindness, understanding and compassion to another more easily than we can give those qualities to ourselves.  Whatever our roles might be--parent, teacher, healing practitioner, friend, etc.--I think many people have had this experience.  In fact, we may be particularly hard on ourselves, feeling critical toward ourselves even more so than we are toward another.  For example, if we lose a job, we might wonder what we did wrong.  If we become seriously ill, we might be prone to some sort of belief that we brought it on ourselves.  Whereas if someone else we know encounters an obstacle, we may feel non-judgemental and loving toward them and their situation.
How can we feel more empathetic toward ourselves and send ourselves the kind, compassionate energy that we so often feel more easily for another's pain?  Try this brief exercise that follows.  Sit comfortably in a chair or on a meditation cushion and connect with your breathing, watching the breath flow in and out, feeling the sensation of the breath coming and going, rising and falling in the body.  Relax each section of your body in turn--face, eyes, jaw, head, neck, shoulders, especially the shoulders.  Send love out to the world--the plants, the animals, the earth, all people. Pick someone you clearly love-- a person or a pet--and feel the warmth in your chest area which you have for this being.  Think a thought of unconditional love toward them, something like, "I love you no matter what you say, what you do, I still love you."  Lift up your hands, palms extended outward, and imagine sending love like streams of electrical energy out of the center of your palms.  Imagine this being whom you love is receiving helpful telepathic waves of light and love from you.  Continue this exercise for a few minutes.
Release this being from your consciousness, after having sent them waves of prayerful energy and encouragement.  Let your palms rest comfortably back on your lap or on the sides of your chair.  Take a few breaths in a neutral frame of mind, no longer thinking of anyone or visualizing anyone.  Now comes the hard part. Send yourself love and encouragement.  Think kindly toward yourself.  Bring to mind a difficult situation for you and send yourself love.  Lift up your hands, and palms facing inward toward yourself, imagine waves of love and light emanating from you to you through your own palms.  Find a sense of understanding toward your situation. I believe gentleness is an important feeling tone to work with in this realm of self-acceptance.  Often we are harder on ourselves than other people are, listing our various faults, failings, and mistakes like a litany in our minds.  Find gentleness for your perceived faults, for all the decisions you made that you think were bad ones.  Gently think of your positive qualities.     Cut yourself some slack.  Forgive yourself for everything. Imagine a forcefield of unconditional love around you, supporting you, understanding your journey.  Feel this Gentle touch of Spirit upon you, seemingly coming from within you, like a healing balm of sacred and soothing waters.
Be there for yourself in the way that you know you have been there for others. All that positivity, gentleness, and understanding you have let flow to others can now rest around you like a cocoon for a few minutes--or longer--enveloping you with a peace that passes understanding.  


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